Tuesday, August 30, 2005

At Peace... Almost - Part 1

When last we left our hero, Yarael Poof had decided to seek out Master Qui-Gon Jinn to help him with some of the finer points of being a Force Ghost...

Scene 1: Qui-Gon's and Jawajuice's apartment.

Yarael: Mon, jah got to help me. I can't do any o' de tings what make life worth living!
Qui-Gon: I'd be, like, glad to help with -
Jawajuice: Not now, though. I need you here, to help prevent Count Dooku from making a hostile takeover of our brownie company and turning it into a chain of cheap fast food stores!
Yarael: What be more important, mon? Me wellbeing, or jah brownie company?
Qui-Gon: My little buddy has a point, Yarael. It's not just the brownies, it's, like, the principle of the thing. Count Dooku's fast food outlets will sell totally fatty food, that has, like, no Kessel spi- er... no *flavor* - and will, like, ruin planetary health standards. We've lost enough battles so far - Bantha King and Kentucky Fried Kaadu have drawn so many teenagers away from healthy foods. If McDooku's opens, there'll be, like, an obesity epidemic.
Yarael: I'll tell jah what, mon. I'll raid Rooku McDooku's warehouse and destroy de secret recipies for his cheap fast food, den jah can help me wit' de whole "being one wit' de living Force" ting.
Jawajuice: I suppose that could work. Come back here with absolute proof that you've done it, and not only will I loan you Qui-Gon, I'll give you a cut-price insurance policy.
Yarael: I'm dead, mon. What would I need jah insurance policy for?
Jawajuice: Well... I'll give you some discount brownies, then.
Qui-Gon: Would those be the brownies that, like, fell in the-
Jawajuice: Shhhh...

The deal is made, and Yarael floats through the ether towards Rooku McDooku's warehouse on Serenno...


Blogger flu said...

hee-hee - Sweet! A transparent Rasta infiltrator headed to the McDooku warehouse, bent on sabotage, in order to gain some afterlife training from a dead Jedi, and get some brownies that have been... uh, nevermind.

7:17 AM  
Blogger JawaJuice said...

First the brownie shortage, now a hostile takeover. Man, I’m gonna need a vacation soon.

But if you manage to pull this off, Poof ol man, I can see some special rum drenched brownies coming your way.

Eh…once we secure some new spice.

10:58 AM  
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Blogger General Grievous said...

[talks to droids]
We're going to Dooku's warehouse!
[speaks into microphone]
All droids report to the hangar and prepare to launch! All ground units prepare to land!
This is Code Red! I repeat Code Red! Red for McDooku's hair! Code Red!
[turns off microphone]
The Yareal guy's going to have fun getting in here *cough*

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